Whose blood you suckin’ now, sucka?
The grandparents arrived last night for a weekend visit. We were sitting in the kitchen, having a drink and catching up on things.
From out of nowhere, a large mosquito, oh, about the size of a titmouse, landed twenty feet across the room from where we were sitting, fifteen feet up, on the peaked ceiling.
Without a thought, I grabbed the closest non-breakable item, a box of Bounce fabric softener, and chucked it like a boomerang. The orange missile sailed across the room and registered a direct hit, crushing the mosquito and instantly croaking him. I slapped the table and giggled like Ernest T. Bass on lithium.
After several seconds of stunned silence, my wife said, “That has got to be the biggest redneck move I have ever witnessed in my life.”
With that said, I ask for your input: