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Posted by on Apr 4, 2008 in Military, Religion | 0 comments

Friday joke. Heh.

A college professor, an avowed Atheist, was teaching his class. He
shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to
prove there was no God. Addressing the ceiling he shouted: “God, if you
are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I’ll give you
15 minutes!”

The lecture room fell silent. You could have heard a pin fall. Ten
minutes went by. Again he taunted God, saying, “Here I am, God. I’m
still waiting.”  His countdown got down to the last couple of minutes when a Marine –
just released from active duty and newly registered in the class –
walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face, and sent
him tumbling from his lofty platform. The professor was out cold!
At first, the students were shocked and babbled in confusion The young
Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silent. The class fell
silent…waiting.

Eventually, the professor came to, shaken. He looked at the young
Marine in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and
could speak he asked: “What’s the matter with you? Why did you do
that?”

The Marine answered, “God was busy. He sent me.”

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Posted by on Oct 11, 2007 in Religion, Tomfoolery | 0 comments

Joke of the day…

Muslims tell Christians: ‘Make peace with us or survival of world is at stake’

In other words, make peace with us, or we’ll kill all of you.

Heh. Nothing says ‘friendship’ like a veiled death threat.

Memo to Muslims: How about cleaning up your own corrupt house? Last I checked, Muslims were carrying out random acts of murder, while Christians were ministering to the poor and downtrodden. In fact, I can’t recall one instance where an innocent person was killed by a Christian-made IED, or where one Muslim country sent soldiers into a neighboring country to rescue victims of floods or earthquakes.

But when a Muslim country suffers massive devastation, a largely Christian country sends in its military without question. Remember when the mountains of Pakistan collapsed, and tens of thousands of civilians were hurt and killed? Which country was the first with boots on the ground, offering aid to the Muslim victims? Syria? Somalia? Iran? Indonesia?

Of course not. IT WAS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.

If you want peace so desperately, how about telling the kooks in your ranks to stop killing innocents and start helping those that need it.

Oh..and while we’re at it…Israel offered aid as well, despite the constant threat of annihilation by its neighbors of a certain religious persuasion.

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Posted by on Oct 8, 2007 in Religion, Tomfoolery | 1 comment

Christian bears. Heh.

An atheist was walking through the woods. “What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!,” he said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look. He saw a 7 foot grizzly charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant the atheist cried out, “Oh my God!!!”

Time Stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

“You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don’t exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?”

The atheist looked directly into the light, “It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?”

“Very well.” said the voice.

The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed.

And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke: “Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive from thy bounty, through Christ our Lord, Amen.”

[Thanks Jason]

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Posted by on Sep 5, 2007 in Religion, Technology, Tomfoolery | 0 comments

That’ll fix it…

KATHMANDU (Reuters) – Officials at Nepal’s state-run airline have sacrificed two goats to appease Akash Bhairab, the Hindu sky god, following technical problems with one of its Boeing 757 aircraft, the carrier said Tuesday.

Nepal Airlines, which has two Boeing aircraft, has had to suspend some services in recent weeks due the problem.

The goats were sacrificed in front of the troublesome aircraft Sunday at Nepal’s only international airport in Kathmandu in accordance with Hindu traditions, an official said.

“The snag in the plane has now been fixed and the aircraft has resumed its flights,” said Raju K.C., a senior airline official, without explaining what the problem had been.

Local media last week blamed the company’s woes on an electrical fault. The carrier runs international flights to five cities in Asia.

It is common in Nepal to sacrifice animals like goats and buffaloes to appease different Hindu deities.

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